An Open Apology

Some of you may have noticed that I have essentially disappeared for a couple of months. What happened in those months, I am not proud of, however, all of you deserve to know the truth. The truth is, I started to party far too much. Almost every night, I would stay out too late, drinking WAY too much and, as a result, began missing work. I’d be lying if I said I did not learn anything from this experience, and two of THE biggest lessons I have learned is that 1, you can in fact get fired from a volunteer job, and 2 is that it is DEFINITELY wayyyyy easier than I thought to reach that “too much” of a “good” thing. This was a massive wake-up call for me, and I absolutely hate the feeling that I have let people down… However, I did not let my days in cusco end, even though I had NOTHING for weeks. As I job and apartment searched, scoured for the cheapest food I could find, and slept on a friend’s couch, I finally found a place to live and a job that allowed me to stay in Cusco, for as long as I wanted. Let me tell you, it can be incredibly difficult at times to stay on my path, and remind myself of my responsibilities, however, what I tell myself everyday now (and what I hope you can all do as well, in times of trouble) is that “This is not how my story ends” You write your story. Your story does not write you, and it’s certainly not going write me. So thank you for all your kind words at the beginning of my journey, and I deeply apologize for my mistakes, but I will not lie down and accept defeat. I will work my ass off, everyday, just to prove to myself, and the world, that I am not the girl dancing on the bar every night. I am the girl who works behind a bar in order to make ends meet. The girls who wants to study until she reaches her PHD. The girl who’s biggest dream is to be a field researcher for the National Geographic. I am better than my past, and I am DETERMINED to prove it.